It’s already been four months since K popped the question, and I can’t believe how much of the wedding we’ve planned. Over the last few months as a fiancée, I’ve learned a ton about wedding planning and even more about the people in my life. It’s wild how many details go into planning this particular event and how many personalities you’ll juggle during the process. If you recently got engaged (congrats!) or want to bookmark this for later, these are 5 Lessons I’ve learned so far while wedding planning.
1. People will surprise you (& it’s good and bad)
After getting engaged, a few other brides told me I should expect the unexpected, that I might get weird behaviors, unforeseen reactions from loved ones, etc. I didn’t get it until it happened to me. To be honest, some of it has been really disappointing. But the flip side is that others have stepped up and made us feel loved and appreciated. So keep that in mind – don’t have any “expectations,” and remember that it’s not personal (they’re just not thinking about you, LOL).
Recommended Books:
2. Discuss before diving into planning and booking
We were in a unique position (we got engaged, and three days later, I left for Italy and had to dive into planning immediately). But if you’re not in the situation, make sure you sit down with your fiancé(e) & respective families to determine the guest list, budget, thoughts, requirements, etc. Everyone will feel included, and it’ll reduce miscommunications.
Tip: The books mentioned in the last section are recommended must-reads before you have these conversations!
3. If you’re the planning type, outsource!
I’m the Type A type of my relationship and our families. I realized early on that for my sake and sanity, I needed to budget for outsourcing. Without hiring a wedding planner or a virtual assistant (for running the rest of your life), you will likely burn out in the first 5 minutes of planning; it’s a lot to take on. Remember, a wedding planner has seen it all, so trust their professional opinion, but don’t be afraid to vocalize your wants and needs.
4. Make time for the serious conversations (like life after marriage)
As we’re having a religious ceremony, there are quite a few courses required before we can say “I do!” It’s turned out to be the best part of wedding planning, but also the part that’s toughest to make time for. Make sure you’re talking about important topics like finance, kids, day to day life, and more.
Friends, family, and followers recommended the below books along the way, and I can’t say enough good things. But seriously, make time to tend to your relationship during the chaos!
5. Have a preferred planning tool (you need Notion!)
We started with Google sheets which very quickly got chaotic. I then learned from a few fellow brides about this incredible tool which I’m now OBSESSED with! It’s also great for planning trips, tracking budgets, etc. Notion puts all your work in one place with easy-to-organize tools and pages. It’s a type-A gal’s dream. You can add collaborators to the platform, so you and your fiancé(e) can both add notes.
For my married gals, what were some of your surprise learnings?
Photography Credit: Paulina Perrucci
